Thursday 5 November 2009

Now what was I looking for?

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In breaking news this morning, Indonesia’s new Communication and Information Technology Minister claimed that Indonesia has the largest number of people accessing pornographic Web sites in the world.

“To date, Indonesia has the largest number of people who access porn sites,” said Tifatul, the former head of the Islam-based Prosperous Justice Party.

Was he able to back this up? Did he have the number of Indonesian hit’s on Youporn, Red Tube, Playboy, Meatspin….emm, err, no!

This is probably because the hard (core) fact’s to substantiate this statement will not actually exist anywhere out-with his imagination.

The Jakarta Globe explained that the minister was “an avid Internet user with his own Facebook and Twitter accounts, as well as a blog” and further mentioned that “he was concerned that the Internet was being used by people in the country for little else besides accessing pornographic materials.”

The best bit was “He said this concern had prompted him to launch a campaign aimed at teaching people how to use the Internet as an online source of useful information.”

OK, despite having the crappiest connection speeds, despite the relatively low number of on-line users, (see here… Asian Internet Statistics and that is only for Asia) and even trying to back this statement using Google Trends and some very compelling “XXX” rated search terms – Indonesia rated overall extremely low in the “ porno download status table”

In fact the highest rating that Indonesia achieved was # 4th place in any of the rankings. (Extra points if anyone can answer the search category) Worth noting that Ireland gets some very high scores, along with Pakistan!

He has however raised the image in my head of the many devout people within the country performing searches for offending websites, offensive images and offensive writings just to firmly establish how bad things are in the big bad internet.

I could give them a few tips, but, I suppose half the fun is in the search itself. Happy browsing!

Monday 2 November 2009

Bit's and Pieces....

Tuning Up....

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Jamu Ladies...the Medical Backpackers (Taste at your peril)

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Traditional Herbal remedies delivered to your door/

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Deep Fried....Roadside Cholestorol, ready to go!

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Crowded Buses...Not in this town!

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Fireworks! Illegal...not in this town!

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Back to the Grind!

I made a journey down to a watering hole in Kemang the other day after twelve days in Thailand. Bangkok, once marked as a city with major traffic woes is nothing compared to the traffic flow (or lack of it ) in Kemang. Despite not liking Bangkok much, it was a pleasant break from Jakarta and my “stress” levels were lowered dramatically, unfortunately only for a short while.

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A brief respite was all it was! Current estimates envisage a complete gridlock within five years with EVERY road, street, thoroughfare and pavement jam packed with vehicles, all day, every day. I’m positive that the pavements carry as many motorcycles as the roads do and the ignorant fuckwits bash the horn, beeping pedestrians out of the way, even those on crutches (as I am at the moment).

Meanwhile, rather than considering ways to alleviate the problem, the city administration chose to pass a law which demanded the disabled wear signs to let motorists know their condition when crossing roads. (Which remind’s me, I now qualify, if only I knew where to get my sticker).

Not a mention of leveling footpaths, no extra bridges, no road widening and improvements, no pushing forward the Mass Rapid Transit system (MRT) no removal of older polluting vehicles, nothing sensible at all….

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The Jakartan obsession with vehicle ownership has ridden roughshod over town planning and it does not appear to be headed for change anytime soon. Urban Reconstruction, Infrastructure Development, Safety…fuck it, low on the list of priorities.

Catching beggars, attempting to prosecute the “Anti Corruptors” (obviously they were getting to good at their jobs) finding ways to slow the disbursement of relief aid and money to disaster area’s, and in my mind the best, closing the cities major recreational area (a central park which houses the Monas Tower) because of kids having a quick shag in the bushes. - these are the real priorities.

Sadly, it seems that congestion is here to stay…..

This of course is not a problem for those with money. Helicopter taxi’s are a growing business and, I found out over a beer in De Hooi a few weeks ago that if you wanted to hire police motor cycle outriders to clear a path for you that this option was only a phone call (and a relatively small amount of money) away. Where there’s a wallet there’s a way!

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Even the economy suffers! Recent studies have demonstrated that if the roads were better planned, if the traffic jams were reduced, if free flowing traffic could be managed, if a limit on the number of vehicles could be enforced (all big if’s I may add) then the Jakartan economy would save approximately US$ 822 million which includes less fuel consumption, less health related problems due to pollution and less downtime at work through lost man hours.

Meanwhile, it’s back to same old, same old and lashings of it. If anyone knows where I can register for my Gimp Certificate to let the motorcyclists be aware that I can only jump out of the way so fast, please drop me a message….

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Sunday 1 November 2009

Springtime for Hitler in Pattaya

As I arrived in Pattaya last week I discovered that these was a bit of controversy regarding the latest “tourist attraction” .

On Sukumviht Road, a number of billboards had been erected advertising the arrival of “Loius Tussaud’s” new Waxwork museum. Featuring Bruce Lee, Michael Jackson and more memorably, Adolf Hitler, each hoarding was emblazoned with the name of the deceased and “is not dead” Bear in mind that this message was in Thai, not English.

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Fair enough, but, while Bruce and Michael had no problems, old Adolf however had a storm brewing over his upraised arm. The busybodies in the world soon let everyone know exactly what the translation was and “boom” moral outrage soon rained down on the hapless museum management.

The Bangkok Post newspaper quoted German Ambassador Hanns Schumacher as saying he told officials in Pattaya, “this kind of utterly tasteless advertisement would hurt the feelings of many people” and asked that the billboard be taken down.

Israeli Ambassador Itzhak Shoham also was quoted saying he requested the same. “It is totally unacceptable to have such a monster like Adolf Hitler on public display,” he told the Post. “How this could happen is beyond my understanding and comprehension.”

It has to be recognised that the use of Nazi imagery has not got the same emotional impact in South East Asia as it does in Jerusalem and Berlin, in fact, the Thai’s have used swastika’s, images of Hitler and even allowed a Nazi Bar to be opened in Bangkok. (The walls of which were adorned with pictures of storm troopers and waiters dressed in jack boots with Nazi armbands.)

Probably the best was an add campaign for crisps had Hitler giving a Nazi salute and then showed a Thai woman who cast a spell on him as he ate the salted morsels, hoping to change his evil ways. A Nazi swastika morphed into the product logo as the transformation was complete.

That advert did not last long. The Nazi Bar had to change it’s name to “No Name Bar” after the wrath of anti Semitism got involved. And what of the Waxworks… although they apologised it seems that the exposure that Adolf gave them worldwide was worth far more than the original advertising campaign originally envisaged.

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I wonder if the whole thing had been planned that way?