Rain Rain Rain

Flooding and general wetness – the Rainy Season returns in force.

Wet, wet, wet is the only way to describe the current climate. Rains are battering Jakarta daily with an average deposition of 2” per day.

Great though it is for vegetation and farmers, the general populace has had to look out last year’s waterproofs and umbrellas and batten down the hatches for the seasonal onslaught.

With the advent of this plethora of precipitation comes the standard mayhem on the roads with the usual nutters unable to control their cars and skidding all over the shop. The local traffic police seem to accept this type of behavior and seem to delight in the antics of the motorists in their care; probably betting on whose idiocy is going to cause the next pileup.

As the surface water increases, so does the amount of crap which flows from the verges at the sides of the roads until the fast lane often resembles a landslip with the amount of rich brown soil which slithers across the lanes.

While the toll roads are normally busy at any time, the traffic increases during the rain due to the side roads which are free to drive on becoming flooded and as the toll roads are built on higher ground they inevitably become crowded to the point of saturation.

While the annual drenching is expected, no-one as always seems to have planned and windscreen wipers which have never been checked in six months appear to have deteriorated into useless strips of rubber with the driver’s complete lack of visibility causing even more havoc.

Even better, pick-up trucks, normally laden with goods tend to be uncovered. When the rain starts, there is a mad frenzy to get plastic or tarpaulin or anything to cover the goods in the back. One poor bastard had a truck full of washing powder, which you guessed it was frothing away merrily while he tried to cover his truck. Brilliant! (where is the effin camera when you need it).

Aquaplaning is another popular pastime with most idiots in the fast lane being unaware of the fact that the fine veneer of liquid they can see in the distance is actually three or four inches deep. Hitting that puddle at 80 km/hr is like watching a cat that has been shot up the arse with an air rifle. POW – the stupid f**ker is all over the shop and cannot figure out that slowing down may actually help the problem.

Having said that, there are plus points and bonuses. Half the female population of the city look like evacuees from a Wet T Shirt competition.

The underpasses and areas under motorway bridges become crowded with those attempting to avoid the inevitable drenching, buses and taxis eager for the attendant business stop wherever they please, and the tomfoolery slides into a scene from the “Blues Brothers” with crashes, bumps and fender benders everywhere.

On a brighter note, the rain cuts through the smog and pollution with the benefits being that once the downpour ceases, Jakarta looks almost habitable in a post holocaust sort of fashion. Blue skies peep cautiously from behind the rain clouds, waiting for their fifteen minutes of fame before the cumulative exhaust haze forces them back into hiding.

Ah – Jakarta!